How to Join the Mile High Club
In 2005, a global survey by Durex of three hundred thousand adults revealed that 2% of respondents reported they were members of the elusive Mile High Club. If about one hundred thousand adults fly each year, that means we have about 2 million Mile Highers in the United States.
So how did the Mile High Club get started? Many attribute its founding to the invention of autopilot in 1914 – which allowed for hands-free flying and much safer flights. Without the need to stay glued to the plane’s controls, many pilots became notorious for finding other uses for their hands. Ironically, the inventor of autopilot, Lawrence Sperry, was once found to have crashed his plane when he disengaged the feature during some frolicking with a lady friend – the two were found naked and Sperry was said to have blamed the “crash” for the loss of their clothes (though many view this as unlikely).
Even decades beyond the famously lax Jet Set era of air travel, the mysterious Mile High Club continued to add to the mystique of flying. In 1996, British Airways all but invited passengers to join the club by offering a first-class seat that turned into a bed for two. And in 2002, when diaper changing tables were installed in the lavatory of bathrooms on the airline's fleet, flight attendants reported they were broken nearly beyond repair within weeks.
But let's be real, as airlines have consolidated, gone bankrupt, and cut costs – a flight in coach these days is hardly bearable, let alone sexy. Cramped coach seats and coach bathrooms are a far cry from romantic, to say nothing of the more stringent post-9/11 cabin crews that have a finite tolerance for couples sneaking off or fooling around.
Nonetheless, the mile high club is alluring for a reason (who doesn’t like breaking the rules?) and if you want to join it we have a few practical suggestions:
- Consider an upgrade: Virgin America and Singapore Airlines offer seats in first class that convert easily into doubles sleep pods. Just wait till the other passengers are sleeping, and then claim your membership in the MHC.
- If not, use a big blanket: In terms of not drawing attention to your escapades, you are far better off opting for an orgasm via a handjob or fingering under a blanket (or, if you’re feeling adventurous, parlaying resting your head in someone’s lap into a bit more). However, if you must attempt the bathroom – consider easy access opportunities like a skirt or crotchless panties to save precious time. If you get caught out taking too much time in the facilities or entering with someone else, try a plausible excuse such as that you have an upset stomach from your fear of flying and need a friend to calm you down, or that you don’t like being in closed spaces alone. Hey, it’s worth a shot!
- Watch out for children: Remember that if you choose to take the route of public displays of erotica that it is technically illegal to have sex in public (public indecency laws are meant to protect the impressionable kiddos from learning they came from something other than a stork) so be discrete and save your sexy screams for when you make it to your hotel room.
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