How to be a Witch in the Bedroom
You’ve heard of sex and you’ve likely heard of magic, whether it’s through your familiarity with the Harry Potter franchise or you’re practicing tarot and good luck charms in your free time. Sex magic—literally casting spells in the bedroom—combines the best of two worlds to create spells that are as powerful sensually as they are spiritually.
What is sex magic?
Sex magic is a type of witchcraft that’s performed in the bedroom, typically in conjunction with sex acts. Sex magic often relies on orgasm and sexual arousal, along with a desire to fuel the spells that are being cast.
Casting spells via sex magic can be powerful for a number of reasons. You’re relying on your body’s natural excitement and desire and channeling it toward a goal or outcome. You’re also practicing with a partner, which means doubling the amount of energy that’s being focused. The more in tune you and your partner are during the spell, the more powerful the outcome will be.
Where do I start?
If sex magic is your first introduction to witchcraft, it might be wise to consult a more experienced witch and learn about some of the basics first. Since sex magic involves two or more partners and typically requires more concentration since you’re multitasking, it makes sense to learn how to perform a simpler spell or master the tarot before you try more complicated spells.
There are a number of resources for beginner witches, such as Luna Luna Magazine, which offers how-to guides for basic witchcraft by experienced spell casters, as well as books like Everyday Witchcraft: Making Time for Spirit in a Too-Busy World by Deborah Blake.
Once you feel comfortable performing routine spells and incantations, and you feel you’ve harnessed your energy in a positive way, it might be time to consider sex magic. First bring up the topic in conversation with any sex partners you’re planning to perform with, unless you’ll be doing it solo during self-arousal. It’s worth making sure that anyone who will be involved knows what sex magic is, what it entails, and takes it seriously, because you won’t achieve a desired outcome if you’re not all focusing your energy with intention.
If you need some more inspiration, here's a list of our favorite witchy role models.
What do I need?
What you need to prep for sex magic depends on what kind of spell you’re looking to perform. Are you trying to increase sensuality in your sex life or are you trying to draw a positive outcome in a recent employment search? Sex magic is all about naming your desires—and turning them into a conscious energetic force.
Common materials for spell casting include: crystals, semi precious stones and metals, candles in a variety of colors, tarot cards, runes, and certain plants, such as lavender. The most important part of performing sex magic, though, is in your intention, so prioritize getting yours and your partner’s energy focused and use whatever tools help you do that. If placing a singular tarot card beside you on the bed helps, that’s great. If lighting a blue candle helps fuel the fire toward your spell, then use that as a tool to keep your mind focused.
What exactly do I do?
When you get down to it, sex magic is a very personal choice. If you’re working with a partner or multiple partners, you’ll want to decide on any tools you’re using and what spells you’re performing ahead of time so everyone is on the same page. If you’re casting this solo, just channel your desires and choose a spell that feels right to you, and helps you draw something into your life that you need or want.
Sex magic is like all witchcraft in that it is deeply personal and based on your individual circumstances, which is why it helps to be familiar with basic tenets of witchcraft before using it in the bedroom. Once you’ve settled on a spell that’s right for you, and chosen any materials you’d like to work with or incantations you might use to reinforce the energy you’re harnessing, it’s all about making it a part of your sexual exploration in a way that feels comfortable.
The key to great sex magic is the intent—channeling your arousal, energy, and desire into a focused outcome. If you find you like it and it works for you, it may just become a part of your regular sex routine.
About the Author: Alaina Leary is an editor, activist, and social media manager based in Boston, MA. She has an MA in publishing and digital media from Emerson College. Read more from Alaina here.
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