Born and raised in Brooklyn, NY, Shazi Lyle loves cats, music, and studying social constructs. As a former Sexuality, Women's and Gender Studies major, she is obsessed with intersectional feminism, and is in love with the Unbound mission.
(Ten) Fantastic Orgasms and Where to Find Them
Back in college, I was part of a women’s group that performed our own version of Eve Ensler’s The Vagina Monologues. One of our finale pieces, called “Moans,” was meant to represent the types of moans one might elicit during masturbatory adventures. It was easily one of the most entertaining pieces we performed, and as I was thinking about it recently, I wondered if the same could be done with different types of orgasms.
Let’s be real–not all orgasms were born equal. The sensation of some will stay with you for a lifetime, while there might be others that you could not have forgotten faster. I’ve also found that experiencing orgasms might be different with a partner than by yourself, or if you were using a visual or auditory aide rather than your imagination. So in my attempts to chronicle all these unique O-ccurrences, I came up with this list:
1. The Consistent Clit
I’ve heard people say before that the clitoral orgasm is the easiest one to achieve, or that it’s just Orgasm 101. Personally, I don’t think there’s any wrong or basic way to orgasm, and if a certain part of your body can be depended on to give you pleasure, why not constantly show it love? As you may have heard, the clitoris’ only purpose is to provide sexual gratification, which makes it the perfect lil’ button of bliss. Some people might prefer more direct stimulation to the clitoris, while for others, that might be overbearing and painful. There’s also some speculation that your clitoris might be more sensitive on its left or right side, which is not necessarily linked to which one is your dominant side–so feel free to explore the area to find the sweet spot that’s right for you. That said, this is the kind of orgasm that feels more external, like a wave of pleasant energy coming over you. You’ll likely feel it in your head, like a suspended moment of clarity. Everything is right with the world. It’s all good.
2. The Vaginal Va-Va-Voom
Now we’re getting a little deeper, hmm? Okay, so the vaginal orgasm is usually going to be credited to the G-spot (which does exist!) which is not quite an on/off switch, but more of a gathering of sensitive tissue that can lead to a rumbly-makes-your-stomach-jumbly kind of orgasm. Vaginal orgasms are more internal, and really vibe throughout your body. I like to think of them as mini earthquakes of the most pleasant variety.
3. The Corporeal Climax
There’s a bit more body to this number...because it’s from your body! Probably your mind too, if we’re being real. It’s totally possible to have an orgasm without genital stimulation, and it can come about from neck massages, a teasing touch on a thigh, some classic nipple play–just about anywhere! You’re probably aware of erogenous zones, but maybe it’s time for you to get more in touch with your personal hotspots. This kind of orgasm feels like a tingly spread of warmth and sensitivity, like the kind of good tickle that you consent to.
4. The Running on Empty
This is the kind of orgasm that tests endurance and willpower. You know it’s not gonna happen, or if it does, it’s not gonna be much good. The thing is, at this point, you’ve dedicated so much of your time and effort into getting off that it would almost seem sadder to give up now. Mama didn’t raise no quitter, so you stick it out to the very end! Besides, all’s well that ends…eventually.
5. The Shock to Your System
This is the kind of orgasm that leaves you #shook. It’s so wonderfully remarkable that you aren’t even sure how it came about, but all you know is you want it to happen again. It’s the kind of orgasm that makes you jolt and makes you feel like you’re having an out-of-body experience. As it subsides, you can only laugh because you still don’t know how to react–like, did that just happen?! You might want to give yourself a little time off before chasing this baby again. It’s just a myth that lightning never strikes the same place twice, so get yourself primed for the next roll of thunder.
6. The Underwhelmer
It is literally the embodiment of, “...Oh. That was it?” Maybe you hit a plateau along the way, or maybe you started wondering if you left the light on in the bathroom right before you reached your good place, but something took away from your big moment. It’s okay–it happens to the best of us. Perhaps all orgasms aren’t meant to be earth-shattering moments, and sure, this was was a little eh, but it happened, right?
7. The Flow Rider
Let me start by saying that squirting is real, and we’re gonna talk about it. If you’ve never squirted, no worries–there’s nothing about this that makes it The Ultimate Orgasm™. It is achievable, however, and usually comes as a shocker in the moment, even if you know you’re capable of it. The actual sensation of this kind of orgasm isn’t particularly stronger than your average, but you will definitely have a lot more in aisle five to clean up after.
8. The Quick ‘n’ Dirty
Not every orgasm is a work of art. Sometimes you just gotta rub one out and get to the finish line. Keep it short and sweet, relieve some of that sexual frustration, and maybe even alleviate that pesky headache. This kind of orgasm is like the physical manifestation of a lightbulb going off over your head–ding! Done and done, you’ve uncoiled some tension, and now you’re ready to relax and carry on with your day.
9. The Slow Motion
What’s the rush? You’ve got all day and you are going to treat yourself to some good ol’ TLC. You know that the bigger the effort, the greater the reward, and you are fully committed to getting the most out of this. This isn’t the type of orgasm that just happens–you might have even scribbled it into your planner to make sure you had the time–but you are primed to ride that pleasure wave into the sunset. This kind of climax takes a little more control and care, as once you get that tension built up, it’s all too easy to tilt over the edge and then it’s over before it really began! If you time it right, however, you can lead yourself into one of the most powerful orgasms you’ll ever have, with amazing aftershocks that’ll have you trembling long after you’re “done.”
10. The Marathon Runner
Okay, so we live in a time of binge watching and we’re used to the whole back-to-back mentality. Taking all that into account, and with the ability to have multiple orgasms, it’s no wonder some of us are screaming, “Next!” Whether you’re a sprinter, a distance runner, or you’re really just going for the long jump, this is one race where everybody wins–over and over again. The best part of this kind of orgasm is that you can switch it up if you’d like, or just rinse and repeat what works best for you.
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